WINNING STREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!

3 in a ROW! It's craziness. My brother and me can't hardly believe it. Only 3 in a row? It should MUCH more. But the GRizz did it the right way. They did it with defense and scoring and hustle. Plus a good bit of old fashioned know-how mixed in with a little bit of elbow grease and perhaps a sprinkling of lady luck's lipstick. Or maybe it was eyeliner. Either way, they didn't need much. They certainly didn't need to go steady with lady luck. The team is much too strong to rely on nothing but luck. No, they really didn't need any luck with their mix of young talent and veteran savvy from players long since forgotten. But I remember how important Shane Battier and Eddie Jones were. They were the type of mentors that could lead a team to victory. Where's the veteran leadership going to come from on this team, though. Marc Gasol certainly looks tall but he's actually not that old. Hakim Warrick has a name from the old country, but he's actually not even 30. I remember how he played in college on that Orange Man team. I was crazy about Kansas that year! For my money, there's absolutely no better coach than Roy Williams, except for maybe Hubie Brooks. Now he had some veteran savvy. He's better on TV though than a lot of guys his age and younger. It's really all about the effort and these Grizz all get straight A's in that category. WEll done, guys. You deserve a break for your hard work, but your work's not finished yet by a long shot. Go beat TEAMS!

Happy Weekend to US!

Did you guys see the news? The GRIZZ are BACK!!! They won big time last night against a TOUGH Clipper team. I don't know what that coach of theirs(I can't remember his name, but it's something foreign...GO IMMIGRANTS) did to get them back on track, but it obviously paid off in a big, big way. I bet that it was all part of the plan. The losing, I mean. The GRIzz were just lulling the league into a trap. A GRIZZLY bear trap! Don't sleep on this team, though, or you'll learn a lesson. You'll learn a lesson that you had best remember forever and ever. The lesson, as always, is when you assume something and become all arrogant and cocky about it, then there is a good chance that you will be proven wrong in certain circumstances that present themselves in said situations. Besides, if I were going to sleep on the Grizzlies, then I'd roll over on Gasol. He's so big and hairy that it really would be like sleeping with a GRizzly bear. Except this Grizz bear wouldn't eat you out; he'd be more likely to put his big ole Grizzly bear arms around you to protect you from the cold, cold night. And mornings are cold, TOO! Have you ever noticed that, friends? If I had to pick the coldest part of the day, then I'd have to watch the thermometer all day to know for sure. But if I had to guess, then I'd guess the part when it was the darkest. And that's right before the sun comes up in the morning. And that's when I'd most want to be sleeping with Marc Gasol!

Go GRIZZ! GReat win last night!!!!!!! We want MORE!!!!!!!!

It's too hard right now

I couldn't enjoy Turkey Day, the most special of all the bird holidays. I can't sleep anymore. I can't eat. But I've gained 15 pounds since last time I weighed which doesn't seem that long ago but I can't even remember what it was the last time. My weight, I mean. I can't even work up the gumption to care about insurance. It's the Grizzlies, friends. They're literally choking the life out of me. How much longer can we go on like this? An undefeated season is so far out of reach now that I can hardly remember when it seemed like such a certainty. And that was only 3 weeks ago. Changes have to be made. It's just too much to take right now. Something has to give. That's why I think that some players have to be moved for different players from other teams. It hurts my heart to see any Grizz players from this team go, but at the same time, it hurts my eyes to watch them. Which I don't because I can't get any of their games on the ol' boob tube. So, you know...paradox. Which is how I feel right now. I am a paradox of love for my team.

Another recap of a loss...this time to the Spurs

This is getting depressing. I didn't even recognize any of the names on the Spurs. What happened to David Robinson? I don't know what's wrong with this team. They are just so awesome that this shouldn't be happening. Not in a million years. Other teams must really be gearing up for the Grizz this year because they recognize their greatness, too. I've seen the roster. They still have Rudy Gay. So there's only one thing that could be messing them up and I hate to say it because I don't believe in playing the Blame Game. That always gets me and my wife in an argument and she still won't kiss me on the mouth because of the cat poop/boodle incident. But the blame HAS to fall on...


the fans. That's right, friends. It's us. We are obviously not pulling hard enough for this team. They need us. They're young and frightened and good-looking and athletic and long. They just need us to support them in a way that is conducive to producing a winning team. I know that I'm willing to do anything. ANYTHING to help this team. I just get the feeling that not everyone is like that. Well, get your acts together, friends! And I'm sorry, but the Cat Boodle award goes to US, the fans. Because we're not doing our part. However, the Funnel Cake award goes to the FANS, TOO! Because we get to root for this awesome team and these AMAZINg players! GO US AND GRIZZ!

grizzly/jazz recap

I just want so much for these young Grizzlies to win that it's almost unbearable when I find out that they didn't. And on Sunday, no less. I can't help but start blaming myself. What could I have done differently during their game to help them somehow? It's hard to say because I don't even know what time they played yesterday. When are NBA games usually played? If I could somehow find that out and go back in time to change what I did, then I'd go WAY back in time. I'd warn the country about Pearl Harbor actually. But then Pearl Harbor with Josh Hartnett and that other guy probably wouldn't have ever been made in this alternate reality. But all those PEOPLE! I wish so much that I didn't have this responsiblitity. I know the right thing to do, but I really love that movie. And the Grizz. How to help both of them? I don't pretend to have the answers, friends. This is what they call a paradox.

BEST THING ABOUT BEING A GRIZZ FAN?

THE FEMININE NAPKIN RACES!

Nothing gets me more excited about getting out to The Pad then the seventh inning running of FEMININE NAPKINS! It used to all fun in games when the runners were shaped as the napkins, but in 1998 when they switched over to one uniform feminine napkin costume, the races really turned for the best. I love fair and unbiased competition from tampons, pads, and adult diapers.

I remember my father and uncle telling me stories of the feminine napkin races of the old. When they would push, squeeze, applicant, unravel, pull on the strings and any other method to soak up a win. I could only imagine how unappealing that would be.

Here is a picture of my favorite napkin racer, Overnight Maxi coming down the stretch right before being soaked in a celebratory shower of dark red wine.

GRIZZ/Mavs Recap

Oh. My. Goodness. The Mavs just have our number, Grizzlie fans. They beat us in the playoffs and didn't allow us one single win. And now they're beating us in the regular season in a purely mean spirited fashion. 91-76? That's uncalled for. They didn't have to do that. Those Grizz are out there trying their HARDEST. CALL OFF THE DOGS, Mavs! You want to embarrass someone? Embarass ME! I can take it. Or better yet, embarras YOURSELVES. Because you SHOULD be embarrassed! So, in effect you just DID embarrass yourselves. Whether you know it or not. And you do know it deep down in your cold dead beating hearts. You know the name of your shame and how it got that name and why we call you that name. By winning in a totally uncalled for way. So the joke's on you, Mavericks. Your win is your loss. For shame. My Grizz will be back. I'm not worried about that. And when they beat YOU by a lot, then they'll have some class about it and just beat you by a little. You can COUNT on that. You can count on THAT by less than 10 POINTS! Keep your heads up, Grizzly players. You all are the REAL winners. And me. Because I just might be your biggest fans.

In closing, the Funnel Cake Award goes to ALL the Grizzly players that played tonight. You're all winners and I'd be honored to share a funnel cake with each and every one of you. That'd have to be a BIG funnel cake! However, for the MAvericks I made up a new award for you guys that I will hand out from time to time. It's to remember your heartless actions in the heat of battle. But you don't get something delicious like a funnel cake. Because this is a bad award. Instead you get the worst thing that I can imagine right now. It's something that turns my stomach and literally leaves a bad taste in my mouth. You get the Cat Boodle Award. And the stench is all over you ALL.